Calander of Events 11-9-15 to 11-15-15

Now that you have saved all that time by not shaving, you can go out and do something. Here is a list of Events Planned for Omaha this week.

Monday 9th - Trivia Night at The Max 10:00 p.m.

Wednesday 11th - Veteran's Day Lunch & Program 
 Strategic Air & Space Museum - Ashland, NE

Friday 13th - Bad Luck Bowling with the Big O! Bears  
Maplewood Lanes 9:00

Saturday 14th - Trading Faces https://www.facebook.com/events/927011754002952/ 
Flixx 10:00 

                             Saturday 14th - Gear Night  https://www.facebook.com/events/170033323346140/
                             The Run/OMC 10:00

                             Sunday 15 - Sunday Dinner - Piccalo Pete's
                             Big O! Bears 6:00 p.m.

Body Image/ Letting your Fur Fly in Omaha

     Bears come in lot of shapes and sizes. They come with a lot of fur and sometimes they come with no fur at all. The only thing that ALL bears should have in common is their love and respect for other fellow bears. Sometimes the Omaha Community judges based on a look, weight, or even age. Last month The Bears from the Big O! Bears started something fun and interactive. They started a spontaneous movement called #OctobareBears. Guys took to the the Big O! Bears Facebook page and posted shirtless pictures of themselves. For some it was a easy task, for other it was a lot harder to do. There was so much love and support for all the bears that posted a pic. It was a movement to say, "Look at me Omaha. This is who I am and I am proud of that." Everyone that posted a picture should be proud of themselves. It is a brave thing to do to take your shirt off. For some of us, it is really hard to do it. Everyone of those guys deserves a woof. Congrats to the group for supporting Bears being Bears. That is one of the main reasons to have a group like this.

     So many times in Omaha, guys that feel left out become hard on themselves. They think they have no self worth. People have looked at them weird for having to much hair or to much weight. This is a shame. We can not stop how people see us or what they find attractive, but we can say to ourselves that "We have self worth"  So if you are feeling like that in Omaha, I encourage you to reach out to me or the Bear Group. I encourage you to come to some events or start some of your own. If you are around me, you are not allowed to feel bad about yourself or others. It starts with you. Make Omaha better by starting with you.  If you think others are staring at you for any reason, then give them something to stare at. Show them Pride.

What Makes a Bear a Bear?

Does it make you a bear if you are a hairy guy? Are you a bear if you are a bigger guy? Does Bear mean that you are masculine? What Makes a Bear a Bear?

In this post, I examine what I think makes a bear a bear. Some of the answers you will agree with and some you might question. Again, this is just what I believe makes a bear. You are might have your opinion, but this is mine.

He is my simple definition: If you respect other in and around the gay community and are willing to be inclusive, than congratulation you are a a Bear!

Of Course there is a lot more to that. I think of Bears as the Punk Rock of the gay community. Maybe a bunch of misfits that have been told no by the Establishment, yet ban together to say "we will rise above and be counted." 

But a better way to tell you what makes a Bear a Bear is tell you what I think doesn't make a Bear.

1) Being Rude: A Bear should never stare down someone for who they are. A bear should never hate a twink for being a twink. A Bear should never do nothing when they see a new bear in the group. They should welcome them with open arms and give them a bear hug. A bear doesn't judge someone because of how someone looks. The only reason a bear should be rude is if someone is being negative and being rude first. Don't Poke A Bear!

2) Being Exclusive: A Bear doesn't just hang out with the same group of bears over and over. He grabs a newbie and asks him to join in the brotherhood. Bears look after each other, regardless of how long you have know each other. A Bear tries to sit by the newbie at a Lunch or a Potluck and gets to know them. A Bear makes other feel welcome because they know what is like to be brushed off for being  "different"

3) Judgemental: A Bear doesn't Judge. He knows what is is like to be Judged

You will notices I didn't put that A Bear isn't a Twink, an Otter, A Transsexual, A Drag Queen, A Straight Guy....... (I can go on if you want) but if anyone of these types of people wanted to show respect and help their fellow man, well that makes them a bear.

If you believe in yourself and others and want to be in a brotherhood that helps each other, than that makes you a Bear. Any
thing less would be called sad.

You Should be watching BULK: The Series

Most of you Bears know about the Web Series "Where The Bears Are". I am here to tell you about a different Bear Web Series that doesn't get the same limelight as "Where the Bears Are", but deserves every second of praise. BULK - The Series is an exciting, raw, sexy dramatic web series exploring the Bear Community in New York City. J. Julian Christopher and D.R. Knott are Executive Producers. It is more Dramatic than "Where The Bears Are". There is sometimes a sweetness to BULK that comes off during the viewing. There are also some hard moment to watch , but it does deal with a lot of topics that come with the Bear Community. Great Cast that grows with the second season. Each episodes leaves you wanting more. I hope you check out Bulk Soon. Here is the very First episode.

Bears - Tom Goss

A Letter to a "Community"

   First I need to say, I am not an expert on the gay community. I don't claim to be an answer to a problem. This is just my letter to a community that I believe might have lost the way.

   I live in Omaha, NE and I love Omaha. Nebraska isn't the most gay friendly place on the planet. Some people claim we are going to be the last state to legalize gay marriage. I don't know about that. I do know that in this state you can be denied housing for being gay. It is also not illegal to reject service in a restaurant for being gay. While the gay marriage issue is a hot topic and many in the community complain about Nebraska, perhaps our community needs to fights some smaller fights first. (Again, I am not the answers. You may or may not agree with me. That is fine. Just please don't judge without looking inside yourself first.)

    While Nebraska is fairly red, Omaha is a very purple city.  Living in the most progressive city in Nebraska must have advantages for a gay community, yet so often I hear many people in the community complaining.  This isn't a letter to stop the complaints or to place blame. This is a letter in hopes of moving forward. Here are the steps I believe we need to take in order to achieve that goal.

1) Stop Blaming Omaha: Sure there are only three gay bars in Omaha, but that is three more than in Fremont, Nebraska City, Milford.... (you get the point) Omaha is the progressive Nebraska and you should be lucky that you live in this city. Does Omaha need some growing up? Yes! Is Omaha the best place for a LGBTQ person? Probably Not! But it is by far not the worst. There are many groups in Omaha to help. Some business are very gay friendly. Omaha is not the worst or the best. Omaha is Omaha!!!

2) Stop Blaming Other Gay People: You think someone is making a snide comment about you? Let them!!! You heard me correct. Let them!!! They are the sad person for trying to bring someone down. If you respond to them, well you are giving them attention. Since they are sad lonely people, they are trying to get attention anyway they can. Is this a hard thing to do? Yes, but these people must not win. I believe in people and I believe in Omaha.

and the most important thing. 

3) Stop Blaming Yourself: "No one will date me!" "I hate that there is nothing for me to do!" "The community judges me!" "The Community is very cliquish!" "I go out, but no one will ever talk to me!" If you have thought or said any of these things, then you are just really blaming yourself. Let me explain. You are what you make your day. If you wake up grumpy or unhappy and stay that way all day, than don't complain when someone doesn't want to be around you. We are the hardest on ourselves. Some might think they are unattractive because of their shape or the way they act. This is not true. The only thing that makes you unattractive is a negative attitude. Who wants to date someone that says all these negative comments. Is it hard to be positive? Yes!(get the theme yet) but the work will benefit you. I promise.  The first thing you have to do is stop blaming yourself and you will stop blaming others for being so called cliquish or shy.

I don't claim to know everything about the gay community. I do know this.... Why are we so willing to write each other off when we live in a state that is already doing that.  How do we expect a state to follow through when we don't do that ourselves. We have a duty. We live in the progressive city of Nebraska. It is our duty to start the change. To make sure no one gets denied service in any restaurant. To make sure that no one is oppressed about age, weight, height, or whatever. We have a duty. It is time to stop taking it out on each other and rise above. It is our duty. It is our right. It will be work, and I have faith in the city I love. We have a duty Omaha.

Sorry

Sorry I have neglected this blog. I started this blog less than a year ago and I haven't been the best at keeping it up. I promise you that I will be back. I feel to strong of emotions with the gay community in Omaha to just be silent. Please "Bear" with me. lol HUGS to all.